Thursday, April 27, 2006

Not worth a free lunch.

So I was sitting at my desk, wondering what I was going to do for lunch. I didn't much feel like going home or going out because it was cold and wet outside. I didn't feel like ordering in because I just wasn't that hungry. And I didn't want to wait. So I IMed my co-worker downstairs "Can't decide what to do for lunch." How lucky was I when she IMed me back and invited me and my other co-worker to come down and grab some Chinese food they had just ordered for their team!? WHOO HOO! Free lunch! And it's already here! We headed downstairs and helped ourselves to a spread of fried rice, moo shoo chicken, shrimp & asparagus, beef & broccoli, and more. Mmmmmmm! We came back upstairs and sat down to chat and eat and after I was about 3/4 done with my plate, I put something in my mouth, bit down, and BLECCH! Whatever it was I just ate was YUCK! In front of my co-worker, I spit the once-chewed mouthful of food out into my napkin and went, "GACK! WHAT DID I JUST BITE INTO?" My co-worker's eyes widened as she asked, "Are you ok? What happened?" I was convulsing from the putrid taste lingering in the left side of my mouth. "It tasted like a wet cigarette!" I said. I peeked in my napkin and all I saw was a partially masticated wad of food, and the corner of something slightly gray. "BLEEECCCHHH!" I said loudly again. I started spitting back into the napkin, grabbed some tissues and spit in those, too. I just couldn't get the disgusting aftertaste out of my mouth. Have you ever seen a movie where someone eats something disgusting and lets it fall out of their mouth and starts wiping their tongue with a napkin? That was me with the tissue. I threw a wad of napkins, food + mystery gross thing, tissue and spit into the trash and reached for my Diet Coke. I really hated to introduce another taste into my mouth, but I really had to wash out whatever taste out of my mouth, or at least try. I downed half the can in one giant gulp. And I could still taste the yuck. It was about as good as I was going to get. Right now it's 2 hours later and I still feel nauseated, feel like my mouth is contaminated by the yuck, for some (surely it's gotta be related) reason, everything around me smells like feet. This was SO not worth a free lunch. I'd rather be hungry. Actually there are a whole lot of things I'd rather be than feeling like this. UPDATE @ 7:40p: Just got home from work. Of course the first thing I did was brush my teeth/tongue VERY thoroughly. And gargle. A lot. Still taste the yuck, though.

7 Comments:

At 4/27/2006 03:34:00 PM, Blogger Jon said...

So what was it? An aborted phoetus??!!

And those wiley Chinese, they may have put pee pee in your coke....

 
At 4/27/2006 04:42:00 PM, Blogger Nez said...

That has right put me off going for a meal this evening . . . but I'm too lazy to cook, so I think I'll chance it.

 
At 4/27/2006 05:21:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Been reading your blog. Most things in it seem to be about shopping, sleeping, and eating(or at least putting things in your mouth). How about some inner musings on your world view, or are those three things all of your world?

 
At 4/27/2006 07:37:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Anonymous:

Perhaps my blog is not the place I choose to share my "inner musings." Ever thought of that? Or is anonymously leaving assholic comments other people's blogs all *you* can do?

But then again, if you want to choose to believe that "shopping, sleeping, and eating" is "all of my world," I really don't give a flying fuck.

 
At 4/27/2006 08:57:00 PM, Blogger Ohjeeze said...

EEEEsh! I just had Chinese for dinner. I feel like looking through all of the left overs to make sure it's safe. Oh, and ignore what annonymous said. It's your blog, and you get to write what you want.

 
At 4/28/2006 08:50:00 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

OMG that is awful! I feel bad for ya.

 
At 4/28/2006 11:12:00 AM, Blogger Unknown said...

I always thought joz was the Energizer bunny undercover.

and who cares what annonymous sez, this is your blog, you can write about anything and i love it :)

 

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